Say My Name
by sayuki-hime
Summary: She's been standing there for so long, but she's never spoken to him. He changes that.


"Nemu."

Her name lingered on his lips, caught in his breath. No one said her name quite like he did, but then again, till now, only Mayuri had ever called her by her name. It was... Special. It made her heart skip a beat. It made her feel warm, and it made her feel alive.

---

Kurotsuchi Nemu walked along the stone-paved walkway leading past the 11th Division training grounds. She knew she could, would, find him there, as always. He would be training, as always. She would look at him from her hiding place behind the apple tree in the courtyard, watching him, drinking in the sight of him... As always.

No, she never had the courage to talk to him. She couldn't find the words to begin.

She remembered the way he glanced at her, when Mayuri threatened her. That one single glance was all it took to get Nemu's heart falling, falling for him. She had always wondered, but she had never spoken to him. Not about what she felt, not about what she thought, not about anything.

How could she? It was impossible between them. She wasn't even sure if he returned her feelings, and Mayuri would have a grand fit if he knew.

And so she took her place behind the tree, muting her reiatsu so he wouldn't discover her. Her heartbeat quickened in anticipation - she imagined that he looked his best while training. His eyes, his face, his voice, and his oh-so-appealing body... She felt that watching him alone would not, would never, be enough.

---

She whispered his name when she slept at night. He was all that filled her mind. He was her comfort from Mayuri.

He was her drug.

---

Something was not quite right this day. She couldn't sense his reiatsu, no matter how hard she searched. Had he muted it, then? But what for? She peered out from behind the apple tree, straining to see if he was around. He had to be, had to be. Her heart broke at the thought of not being able to see him. After a while, she sighed and turned to leave.

"Kurotsuchi fukutaichou?"

Her breath caught in her chest. She turned slowly, her cheeks burning red, and came face to face with the object of her desire.

"What're ya doin' here? Somethin' important ya wanna tell me? Or were ya lookin' for Zaraki taichou, 'cause ya just missed 'im."

Oh, his face. His face. So close to hers, she thought she would die. His questioning eyes, his relaxed and easy stance, katana held loosly in one hand before reaching over so easily to glide it into its sheath.

She averted her gaze, studying the stone patterns on the ground, trying to calm herself, and muttered an incomprehensible reply. How she wished she could melt, or run away - anything to hide from his eyes. Her hands clenched together, and she tried to think of a way - any way - to escape.

_Please stop looking at me. I'm not worth your attention._

"Kurotsuchi fukutaichou?" He leaned in closer, studying her face.

"Please. Call me Nemu."

The sound of her own voice startled her. It certainly surprised him, to hear her telling him to call her by her first name, shock written over his face. The moment her brain registered what she had just said, it was too late to take them back.

"Well, then... Nemu."

Shock jolted her system. Could she believe her ears? Did she dare to? He had only said it once, but already she loved the way he said her name.

"I... Ah..." He rubbed a hand over his bald pate. "I noticed ya standin' here most days, and, well, I was just wonderin' what 11th Division's got for ya to keep on comin' back."

_They've got you._ She wanted to say it so badly.

---

She killed him.

It had to be those eyes, he decided. The way she never dared to look at him, except when he took her to his bed. Or it could be her quietness. The way she never said anything, damn, it drove him crazy. Or was it her killer body? The way she seemed to grow bolder each time? Oh fuck yeah, she was killing him. And at this rate, he'd die happy.

How long was it since... Since he realised that she was all that filled his mind? No matter how hard he tried to think of other things, her face would always resurface.

It had to be then. When that damn Mayuri threatened her. Fuck, he'd do anything to protect her from that bastard. He wanted so badly to protect her, but if Mayuri knew, he wouldn't be the only one getting into trouble. Nemu... Keeping their relationship secret was more important than knocking Mayuri around. That could wait.

Oh, hell. He loved her. The way she moaned his name as she lay in his arms. Her voice was so damn sexy, he wondered why he never noticed it before.

Oh yeah. It's because she doesn't speak much.

She was his drug.

---

"Kurot- ah, Nemu."

He couldn't take his eyes off her. Damned if he knew anything about what she was thinking. He wanted so much to know what went through her mind, what she did here every single day, and if she liked him too.

_Hey wait, what the fuck was that last thought?_

Nemu turned around to leave. He had to stop her. He couldn't bear to see her back faced towards him. Grabbing her wrist, he stepped in front of her, blocking her path.

"Nemu. Nemu."

Damned if he could stop saying her name.

Still keeping her eyes off him, she responded, "What is it?"

Fuck it.

He leaned forward, his lips hovering just above hers, wondering how she would taste, wondering if she would let him taste her.

"I, ah... I got a request." He turned away shyly for a second. How was it that she made him feel so weak? With a new determination, he turned back to face her again. "Say my name." There was a hunger in his eyes. "Say my name, Nemu."

---

How many times had they lain together? She lost count.

How many times had they kissed? He lost count.

How many times had they made sweet, sweet love? They couldn't tell.

But that fire still raged within them, taking them through the night...

Or till they had to part, at least.

---

Her gaze snapped up to his face. Could she really? She had never dared to speak his name, except when she slept, for he came to her in dreams. She was on the verge of crying, from joy, from disbelief.

"Say my name." There it was again. That silent request. Did that mean, then..?

"I... Ikkaku."

At that, Madarame Ikkaku crushed his lips down onto hers, the impact knocking the breath from them both. When they finally parted, Ikkaku's face was as red as Nemu's. He released her wrist, and Nemu rubbed it absently, breathing hard.

For the next few moments, all they could do was stare at each other.

"Ah..." Ikkaku scratched his head. "So, I guess ya'll be back here tomorrow, then?"

Those words seemed to break the spell over Nemu. With a slight smile, she nodded.

And then she disappeared.


End file.
